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Hurt So Good: The Joys of Being A Masochist

Author: Norische

Filed in: masochism



The cold metal of the cuffs bite into her wrists, her eyelids grow heavy as she stands waiting, barely breathing…. anticipating the next blow. Her tongue darts from her mouth to taste the tear that touches her lips, her own tears…the sweet, salty intoxicating taste of pain. She hears the whip rise and feels the wind just a fraction of a second before it’s leather fangs sink into her delicate flesh. Her head falls back and her body sways at the force, her mouth opens in a silent scream. Her mind surrenders to the molten burn of the whip, her body begs for more, her heart echoes a sweet surrender. She is free, she is alive … she is a masochist.

Within the BDSM realm there is a very important ingredient, namely masochism. The M in BDSM, without it the puzzle would be left incomplete, unfinished and empty. Theologists, psychologists, philosophers, writers, and therapists have attempted to understand what exactly is masochism, and what triggers the behaviors around it.

There are eight paraphilias defined in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, 4th Edition (DSM-IV)
published in 2000; Pedophilia, Exhibitionism, Voyeurism, Sadism, Masochism, Transvestic Fetishism, Fetishism, and Frotteurism.

In psychiatry paraphilia is described by DSM-IV as:

“Sexual impulse disorders characterized by intensely arousing, recurrent sexual fantasies, urges and behaviors considered deviant with respect to cultural norms and that produce clinically significant distress or impairment in social, occupational or other important areas of psychosocial functioning.”

In Gale Encyclopedia of Medicine a paraphilia was defined as:

“A condition in which a person’s sexual arousal and gratification depends on a fantasy theme of an unusual situation or object that becomes the principle focus of sexual behavior.”

According to these texts masochism is a sexual focused “disorder”. This interpretation is common within the medical fields. Many physicians see masochism as a sexual dysfunction, based on chemical imbalance or mental defect. There is a long history regarding masochism as an activity practiced by the mentally ill.

Freud described masochism as a perversion; there are those that followed in his footsteps that linked masochism to such things as cannibalism, necrophilia, vampirism, and the criminal mind. A Dr Richard von Kraft-Ebing in 1876 placed masochism under the heading of “general pathology,” so in the late 1800’s masochism became viewed as a pathological behavior, a sexual and psychopathic phenomenon as well as criminal deviant behavior all at once. It became the focus for many papers, writings and books. It also became the focus of much controversy, and many heated discussions. Since it was viewed as a sickness, the “cure” depended on the cause of the illness. If it were a chemical imbalance then perhaps Valium or any number of opiates would help. If it were a learned behavior then perhaps shock therapy would be the answer. If it were a result of mental defect then perhaps simply locking the individual away from society where they would suffer in silence and not spread their sickness to anyone else would have been an acceptable answer.

While this explanation for masochistic behaviors is the most common even within today’s society it is by no means the oldest. The term masochism was created by Kraft – Ebing and was first published in his book “Psychopath Sexualize” of 1876. Leopold von Sacher – Masoch the Australian author of “Venus in Furs” was the original “Masochist”. Just as the Marquis De Sade was the original “Sadist”. It was Freud that originally termed the phrase Sadomasochism, linking the two “sicknesses” together as the opposite sides to the same coin.

Thousands of years prior to the terming of Sadism and Masochism there was a tradition of self “penance” rising up amongst the religiously devout. Several religions accepted physical chastisement as a means of showing ones true spiritual side. Zen Buddhist masters would awaken the student to a higher plain of consciousness by the application of a rod. Monasteries and Convents were rich with those desperate to suffer, as a means to prove their devotion.

Saint William, Saint Rudolph, Saint Dominic, Saint Teresa and The Carmelite nun Caterina of Cardona are just a few of the well established masochists of their day. Monks would regularly walk in precessions through the cities of Europe, beating them selves with rope, rods, switches or any number of implements, these individuals became known as flagellants. Sometimes numbering in the tens of thousands they would march in union, singing hymns and throwing themselves upon the consecrated grounds of the church, their backs a mass of raw flesh, their whips dripping with blood held high in spiritual ecstasy. From the Franciscans, to the Jesuit, from the Dominicans to the Catholics each religion touched on a piece of this euphoric release of secular bindings.

While these actions ran rampant in Europe, the Native American culture of North America had its own influence in the history of Masochism. The O-Kee-Pah or Sun Dance was feared and forbidden by the white man’s law due to its graphic and abusive nature. A young warrior would pierce his chest or back with two metal, bone or stone hooks, these hooks were attached by rope to a tall pole, the young warrior would then be hoisted into the air, suspended by the hooks and would remain so until the hooks tore through his flesh. Sometimes this ritual would take hours, sometimes it would take days; the length of time was irrelevant, in the end the result was always the same, a prolific vision that enabled the visionary to get just a glimpse into the world of the gods.

The history of masochism or self-mutilation is vast and by no means have I covered even a small portion of these rich and wondrous origins. Each culture, religion, country and race has had some taste of masochism within the pages of its history. I encourage each individual to research on his or her own the true history of this rich tradition.

While researching the history of Masochism I found many truths as well as some disturbing ideals. The common definition for masochist is “an individual that derives pleasure from receiving pain”. While this is a basic almost rudimental definition it seemed to be the only common factor amongst the hundreds of pages of information that I came across. While the explanation of what masochism is seems rather simple; the why is apparently a much more difficult question.

There are many theories as to why someone derives pleasure form pain; each theory looks at a different portion of pain or pleasure in an attempt to explain the attraction between the two.

Some theorists state that we learn to be masochistic from early childhood. We receive pain (discipline) from those that we love, specifically our parents or guardians; hence we associate pain and love together. Other theorists state that we seek out physical pain as a means to rectify some subconscious need to punish ourselves for our success in a world surrounded by suffering. While still others say that it is the forbidden or taboo nature of masochism that attracts individuals into its formidable grasp.

I have discussed this topic in length with several self-acclaimed masochists, and each person had a unique and individualistic reason why they enjoyed pain. As I spoke to these extremely different individuals I became aware that the differences go much deeper than just how they became to be a masochist, the reasons they are currently a masochist and what pain is to them…or more specifically what it does for them was also a unique. I did however notice that even though they each had a unique relationship with pain, each one had a basic foundation in which they built this relationship.

It is my speculation that there is not a singular type of masochist, but rather multiple sub-categories within the realm of masochism. At this point I have identified five separate types of masochist.

Social Masochism – These individuals desire to have pain inflicted upon him or herself as a direct result from the guilt of being rich and powerful in a world surrounded by suffering and poverty. This is where you will find many of the CEO’s, Presidents of companies, Ambassadors, Politicians, and Lawyers even Doctors. These individuals are more than willing to pay a Dominant to inflict pain on their person in an effort to relieve themselves of the guilt and self-hatred of having so much while others have so little.

Religious Masochism – This group is the most historic in nature, as stated previously the history of religious masochism goes back centuries before Christ. Many individuals within this category believe that pleasure is the pathway to Hell and hence pain and suffering must be the pathway into Heaven. These individuals desire to have pain inflicted upon them in an attempt to achieve a higher more sacred or spiritual connection with the universe. They seek to show devotion to a higher spirit and show that they are not bound to this world of pleasure and debauchery.

Emotional Masochism – These individuals desire to have physical pain inflicted upon themselves in an effort to replace emotional pain with physical pain; drawing to the surface deep subconscious pain or turmoil and allowing it to go from the non physical realm and force it into the physical realm. As they feel the physical pain they allow themselves to release the emotional pain, when they see the physical scar they understand what was once buried deep inside of them is now visible on the surface, as the scar heals the emotional wounds heal, when the scar is gone the emotional pain is released. This is the category in which you would find “cutters”, those individuals that habitually harm or cut themselves. Most medical professionals put not only cutters in this category but anorexics, bulimics and addicts as well. Oddly enough one of the most famous individuals in this category was Princess Diana, when she admitted to cutting herself during an interview to BBC in 1995; others would be Johnny Depp and Chistina Ricci.

Sexual Masochism – This type of masochist is the “common” masochist, at least in the eyes of the medical profession. This individual desires to have pain inflicted upon their body as a means of sexual release. They are sexually excited by pain, the more dramatic the pain, the more risk the better. These individuals enjoy extremes, they will do practically anything and love every second of it. Edge play is not only interesting for them it is almost mandatory; the idea of living a vanilla lifestyle is not only unpleasant but it would be almost dysfunctional for these individuals.

Physical Masochism – Physical masochists thrive on not the pain itself but the result of the pain. Whenever there is pain involved the body naturally goes through both chemical and hormonal changes. The human body will produce high levels of endorphins, and enkephalins are functional pentapeptides; to be more specific they are what are referred to as polypeptides, they are able to bind up the neuro-receptors in the brain and block the perception of pain. This internal chemical release has an almost sedating effect, which may resemble certain opiates such as heroin or morphine. Therefore when a physical masochist is exposed to pain they will first ride the wave of adrenalin to a heart thundering high, then surrender to the peaceful intoxication of the endorphins, and finally purr with contentment over the latent release of hormones.

When I started this article I began to question myself as to why did one need to understand what masochism is, or is not. I answered myself with one simple thought, if one does not know what drives an individual one cannot learn to take control of an individual. You cannot use the same methods of inflicting pain on a physical masochist as you would with an emotional masochist; not only would your methods be different but the way you treated the individual before and after the experience would also need some consideration.

A emotional masochist may need to be held and gently reassured after a scene, while a social masochist would find the idea of a gentle touch or kind word to be counter productive to the entire experience. A sexual masochist may need sexual gratification after a scene while a spiritual masochist would find even the suggestion to be offensive.

Each person has his or her own place, to appreciate an individual one must understand the individual. Masochism is rich in history and ideals, and to understand masochism one must first understand that it is not a singular faceted stone but a prism of unique and wondrous perspectives.

As with all my writings this is my opinion, take what you will and leave the rest. If you wish to contact me you may email me at Norisch1@mchsi.com

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